Saturday, February 15, 2014

8 Signs You're Fat Shaming Your Daughter (And Why You Need to Stop)

8 Signs You’re Fat Shaming Your Daughter
If you’re doing any one of these things, stop now!  Our daughters, as much as our sons, deserve a life free from judgment and shame.  Women and girls deserve to be seen and heard, and not reduced to objects.

Here are 8 signs you’re fat shaming your daughter:

You put your daughter on diets. Forbid certain foods on the basis of her weight. Or, worst of all, call her out for eating foods you disapprove of.

You voice your contempt of your own body openly in front of your daughter, in hopes you can influence your daughter’s treatment of her own body.

You compare your body with your daughter’s. (EVEN if and when you do so in what you think is a positive way, “I wish I were thin, like YOU.  Your body is perfect, I’m such a fatty.”)

You withhold affection or approval of your daughter as a form of discipline.

You talk about celebrities weight gain and loss when watching television programs or movies.

You discuss friends or family members weight and appearance.

You compliment/criticize your daughter for her clothes, shoes, hair, body more than any other characteristic or accomplishment.

You compliment/criticize your female friends/family/acquaintances more than any other characteristic or accomplishment.

I believe that this is happening in many homes where parents are well-meaning and are loving, kind people who do not know better. We all know that there are societal pay-offs for girls who are attractive. Parents want what's best for the kids, and on a sub-conscious level, I think at times, that leads them to push unrealistic standards of attractiveness on their daughters. But at what cost? 

Together, we can stop fat shaming and the objectification of women and girls. Think of the time and energy girls and women waste everyday feeling bad about perfectly healthy, beautiful bodies because of the intense scrutiny society places on us to be thin and 'flawless.' Let's rise up as a community of people who will not stand for this form of societal bullying. It starts in our own homes.

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