Friday, April 12, 2013

I'll Say it Again: Don't Let the Perfect Be the Enemy of the Good

The other night in the middle of the night, I woke up in a cold sweat with a friend on my heart.  This friend has two small little boys and a sweet baby girl on the way and she's on bed rest.

I can't even imagine.

Small children demand so much time and energy, and they can't understand that you may or may not be in the best physical or emotional position to give it to them when you are pregnant.  That's hard enough even when you AREN'T on bedrest.

Up until the other day, I had not visited my friend once.  But that night, laying awake in my bed, thinking of her, I knew I had to.

So, I decided that I would text my friend the next day and see if I could drop by.  The only time I had available was after Norah's pick up from school which meant that I wouldn't be arriving until late afternoon (I ended up not being there until 4:30.)  And, most times, for most stay at homes moms, that's the home stretch.  In other words, it felt a little like, what's the point?  But, I decided not to let the perfect be the enemy of the good and I texted my friend anyway.

To be honest, I didn't want to go.  It wasn't because I don't love my friend, I do.  And it wasn't because I didn't want to see her, I did.  But, it takes a lot of energy and effort to load up all my kids and go somewhere.  Plus, I knew I wanted to bring my friend a meal and I can barely manage to get a meal on the table for my own family these days.  So, the situation wasn't ideal.

But, again, I decided not to let the perfect be the enemy of the good and we went.  The three littler kids and I went to pick up Norah at school.  We headed for Whole Foods and bought a few packaged items we thought would make a good meal.  It took all of 10 minutes. Albeit, I had to listen to the kids whining the whole time and we made two bathroom breaks in the store, but truly it wasn't nearly the big deal I had made it out to be in my mind.

Then, we headed out for my friend's house.  When we got there, her kids were so excited to see friends and they played.  Hard.  For like, 3 hours.  My friend asked if we might stay for dinner, it turned out her husband was working late.  So, we did.  And, I left a message with Lucas letting him know.  But, get this, it turned out HE was also working late which is so, so hard on me when I am alone with all 4 kids.

So, the two of us mamas together managed to entertain, feed, and clean up after the kids (all without having my friend move too much...she could still hold baby Grant, read books, and cuddle with kiddos while I did meal prep and clean up.)

It was a lovely afternoon/evening for us both.  I left feeling rejuvenated, too.  And, my day and my kids' days were brightened just as much as hers.

I can be a bit hard-headed.  As much as this community thing feels great in theory, it can be hard to live it.  But, yesterday, as is always the case, I was so, so glad I did.

No comments:

Post a Comment